December 2008
20 posts
Here is an excerpt from a pretty intense, “Would You Rather,” book that my good friend got for Christmas. MY GOD.
Would you rather…
…have 9 inch nipples or a 9 inch clitoris?
I love this one so much. So fucking much.
These aren't Will's parents but...
Dad: Check out this vodka I got from the liquor store next to Publix. Bo, it was distilled 7 times. They're always so nice over there.
Mom: I think they're creepy. The guy especially. He looks so strange. It just weirds me out.
Dad: No. They're Indian, they all look like that. They're really nice, always so good with Michael.
Pushing a jeep out of the mud in freezing rain may end in the below result.
“I swear by my Life and my love of it that I will never live for the sake of another man, nor ask another man to live for mine.”
-Ayn Rand
Last night I was talking with my grandfather over some Ovaltine and the topic of ‘loving all,’ came up. It’s something that I say and try to remember a lot. He told me bluntly that he thought it was bullshit and how can I expect...
http://www.themiracleproject.org/ →
I had to make a resume as part of my final exam and I decided to create it with my dream job in mind.
I also decided that I am totally going to mail it in and ask for an internship. It’s kind of a long shot, but why the hell not? California anyone?
It is 5:03 AM and I am on the third floor of the student union sending out paragraphs that look like this:
4:49amTaylor
I’m taking my bloody dick out of thermo’s asshole right now and forcing it against its eyeball, until the pressure is so great that the eyeball pops, leaving no barrier between my blood soaked girth and a tight eyeball
*eye socket
4:55amNicole
I have been sitting in...
Kristin and Will,
I just want you to know how much that pretty little birthday video you made, means to me.
If I watch it, I feel instantly special and loved. I actually just watched it. Therefore I am feeling special and loved.
You are 2 very beautiful people.
PERFECT IN EVERY WAY
Telemarketer: Is [some random name] available?
Me: No, I'm sorry, you have the wrong number.
Him: Oh, okay. I love you. I mean, thank you!
Me: What?
Him: Sorry, I was on the phone previously.
Me: With a girlfriend?
Him: Uh, yeah.
Me: Well, I love you too.
Him: (laughs) Um, thank you for saying it back.
Me: Spread the love.
Him: Have a nice day.
I feel incredibly disorganized right now. Everything. There are piles of clothes on my floor, and books everywhere. But more importantly, I feel like I don’t have a solid grasp on any of my future plans. Christmas break, next semester, this summer, the following school year.
Looking ahead has never been a good thing for me to do. I start to panic. So I am going to stop. Fuck tomorrow....
